Dodged again

I dodged another hospitalization this week.
I don't know how much I gained, I chose not to know that. But I do know I barely made it over 75%. Mama said that if I would have went to the bathroom before I was weighed I probably would be in the hospital right now.
It kinda scares me. Bonnie keeps reminding me that last week I was very dehydrated and alot of the weight I gained back was fluids. But still, it's scary. Twister is still screaming in my ear that I need to go back in the hospital. It's so hard not to listen to him. I'm trying to trust God. I'm doing ok. I haven't totally freaked out or anything. I'm doing alright. Just doing the best I can and taking it day by day, one meal at a time.

"Don't be afraid; just believe."-Jesus, in Mark 5:36. I know for me, trusting and "just believing" are some of the hardest things to do. Especially when we're going through difficult times and we feel like everything around us is falling to pieces. We become afraid and tired, discouraged, we feel like we can't "just believe". But that's exactly what Jesus is telling us to do. I don't always do it. I'll be honest, alot of the time I don't do it. I chose to be scared. I chose to not believe and not trust. But in the end, that is what is going to get us through any situation. By "just believing". I struggled with sending out this verse today because I felt it was hypocritical. But in this verse I'm not telling you what to do. I'm actually talking to myself more than anyone else. I'm just sharing with everyone what God has showed me, and what I'm trying to do.