Stand in the Rain

Yesterday was hard.

I almost slipped, I almost gave in.

People have been asking me how the Dr. went yesterday and the first thing I ask them is, "Do you want to know how it went for me or for my dr.'s?". Because they are two different answers!!

For the dr.'s, it went good. I gained. They were pleased and weren't mad at me this week!

For me, on the other hand, it wasn't so good. I felt very overwhelmed. Let me explain why, ok last week they were all very frustrated and were thinking about the treatment center, well this week I get released to start doing strength training. While I am super excited about working out, it seems really weird. It really scares me. I don't know the exact number I gained, but still I'm freaked out about it. I seriously almost just gave into Twister. He was whispering in my ear. He was wanting me to turn right back to him. I honestly wanted to. But he's had enough of me. There have been too many times when I turn and follow him. I'm not doing it this time. I went to the Basement and that really helped. He was talking about the heavenly crowns we get, and that the "crowns" here on earth don't mean a thing. I want the crown of persevering through this trial. I'm running to my Savior instead of the one who tears me down. Oh, and believe me Twister had something to say about this too.

He's telling me it won't last, I'll try for a little bit, fall and run back to him. But I'm tired of living afraid. He whispers if I stand I'll only fall down, I'm telling him I'm going to stand anyway.

I will stand in this storm. I feel the rain coming, but I'm going to show this storm who my God is. I'll make it through. Even though I feel like crashing down and staying there, I don't at all feel like standing through this. I'm still going to stand. Because my God is big. My God is strong. My God is loving. My God has a purpose for me.

"When the storm has swept by, the wicked are gone, but the righteous stand firm forever."

Proverbs 10:25