Moving Forward/Talk

"Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead." Phil. 3:13...I sent this verse out yesterday and it is very close to my heart. See, the week right before I really relapsed (actually the day Twister "decided" I was going to go back into the hospital the next week) I went to the Basement that night. Matt started talking a little bit about this verse and I knew that God was telling me I didn't need another hospitalization. I heard Him telling me that I've already done that, that's the past and it's time to start moving forward. Did I listen? Of course not. Twister had better plans, so I thought. I ran from God. I knew what He was telling me but I didn't want to listen. Somehow, and for some reason, even though I didn't listen and I completely turned the other way He still pulled me out of the situation. I know it's time to move forward. To quit holding onto Twister. Quit wanting to be hospitalized again. To get on with my life. It's hard....it's not easy. I'm still not listening to God all the time. But, I want to grow closer to Him.

Yesterday was Dr. day......I finally went back to see Dr. Vance after about a month!! The session went good, it really got me thinking about some stuff. The clinic: It went good as well. My weight was up, which was very hard for me to accept. That's the first time in a while that my weight has been up and it's scary. But, I came home, I ate my snack and I ate dinner. The only way I got through that was with God's strength. I didn't go to the Basement last night. We (people from Scarred) actually had a small worship service of our own. We studied the Bible and we prayed. It was awesome. When I came home, I read the Bible some more and I found my verse for today. It really hit home. Big time....
"They claim to know God, but by their actions they deny Him." Titus 1:13...It's so easy to talk the talk. To say we have faith and we trust in God. It's something I have a really, really hard time with. Those of you who are close to me know that. But when it comes down to it,when the rubber meets the road (I think thats the saying! haha) are our actions following our words? Or is our talk only talk? A devoted and dedicated Christian not only speaks of the Truth and faith, they live by it. I don't always live by my faith, I'm ashamed of that. But I'm trying to work on it. I'm praying that God will teach me how to truly trust in Him and have total faith in His ability to get me through any and every situation.